Do You Remember Me?

Last weekend I was at a party – a big party – and a woman came up to me and said (the dreaded line), “Do you remember me?” That question has always caused me a great deal of anxiety, perhaps because I am paralyzed with fear when I cannot remember someone’s name and more often than not I certainly can’t recollect the name of any person who asks me that question!

Well, post FBC, the question sends me into stratospheric levels of paralysis and, quite frankly, annoyance. Why, I wonder, would someone ever ask that question?  Just asking implies that a person may noknow the answer. I mean really.

Back to the party. Because I can no longer repress my emotions (Silver Lining), the dialogue when like this:

She: Hi! Do you remember me?

Me: I have absolutely no idea who you are (with a completely perplexed look on my face).

She: We met in early 2011 at a dinner party.

Me: Was I by any chance wearing a scarf because I was bald and going through chemo?

She: Yes!

Me: As a result of chemo, my memory, especially from that time, is shot.  Would you kindly tell me your name?

So, my friends, now that I’ve given voice to a ginormous source of anxiety of mine, I beg of you to be ever so thoughtful of (especially my fellow cancer) people and rather than say, “Do you remember me?” say, “Hi, I’m Mary, so nice to see you again.” Please oh please don’t (either intentionally or unintentionally) put someone on the spot. It feels majorly yucky, whether you’ve had chemo or not. Just sayin’…



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  1. says

    Someone who asks this is just not thinking, and is frankly inconsiderate. Your reply proved you to be quick thinking and tactful without being rude or humiliating to the said party. Lest we forget ourselves you provided the perfect introduction; "hi, I'm Carolee, so nice to meet again". Sometimes common sense and good manners have to be taught; and can be learned at any age. Thank you, Hollye.

  2. E.B. says

    Excellent tip, Hollye. How about when they come up to you and go "Guess who I am?" You: "I'm sorry, I don't recall." Them: "Yes, you do! Come on, guess!"