Chipper Chicks

Today has been an outstanding, Silver Lined day!

Nearly 3 1/2 weeks since my last chemo, it feels as if the dimmer on the light switch was raised and voilà: the lights went on.  That is the best way to describe the SL feeling of coming out of the debilitating (for me) effects of chemo.

Green Light = GO!


I’m told (over and over and over again) that “most people feel bad for 3 – 4 days and then are fine.”  Well, I have to say that I am (truly) happy for them, but it’s just not how I am rolling.

It reminds me of when I was pregnant (and nauseous every single day of my pregnancy) and people said, “Next month you’ll feel better. No one is sick for their entire pregnancy.”  Well, I’m here to tell you that it is indeed possible to be nauseous every single (solitary) day of a pregnancy.  Now, the GINORMOUS SL’s are that

  1. The HOTY and I made a healthy (and fantastic, if I do say so myself!) little girl  and
  2. The day after I delivered, I hopped out of bed, showered, made my bed and (as a nurse) almost did rounds on other patients.  I felt that great!

I’m hoping that when all of these treatments are done, that I will have a similar “Oh my goodness, I forgot what it feels like to be HEALTHY.  Look out world, here I come!” feeling.

On an altogether different note, as you may recall, our daughter, a/k/a Finally Five and I have created Silver Lining experiences to offset FBC and the side effects from chemo. A SL, as she now knows, is “when something good comes out of something bad.”  What a great life (long!) lesson presented courtesy of FBC.

Though I wish she didn’t have to learn this life lesson so hard and so early, I know, without a doubt, that for the rest of her life, she will look back on this period of time and remember our shared Silver Linings (which is a SL in and of itself)!

Speaking of SL experiences, we had the most glorious one recently when a friend invited us over to her home to see her new, 3-day old baby chicks. Seriously. Baby chicks. At her home.

Now, I grew up in the middle of Indiana, where all I saw was corn.  Chickens and eggs could only be found in the grocery store.  In my early adulthood, I moved to Chicago – the city, not the burbs – where chickens and eggs continued to be found in the grocery store, albeit a gourmet grocery store.

Moving to Santa Barbara has opened a whole new (glorious!) world to me.  I often describe it as a “really big small town” with all of the benefits of both. It’s as if culture, intelligence and sophistication meet starry nights, hens in the backyard and neighbors who would turn inside out and upside down to help one another. Oh and that’s with sunshine 340 days a year! Never in my wildest imagine could I imagine living in a place as magical as this.

Back to the chicks. In the backyard.  It was the first time in my 40 years that I had the opportunity to hold a baby chick. I was elated! They are shockingly light. And soft. And gentle. And amazing.

All I can say is that my heart melted.

This is Buttercup - Awake

This is Buttercup three seconds later - Asleep

Today was a day that that I witnessed life not only through Finally Five’s eyes, but through her heart and soul. I felt the innate and pure joy that she felt when holding baby chicks for the first time.  Astounding.

Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first or last time.

~Betty Smith


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  1. Cameron says

    I love reading your SL good news! I went to SF on Thursday for the Balenciaga retrospective opening at the de Young — it is VERY you! The exhibition is so beautiful…made me think of you!