Brookside Change

Change is at the forefront of my mind today.

This weekend, we had snow (flurries) in Santa Barbara. Today it was sunny and warm. Change.

Today I feel healthy.  Tuesday (after round 4 of chemo), I will be sick (very sick). Change. Change.

Our daughter, a/k/a Finally Five, is changing (physically, emotionally, socially, spiritually and intellectually) daily, right before our eyes. Extraordinary. And magical. Change. Change. Change.

Change is inevitable in life. I cannot change the fact that I have cancer. However, I have the Silver Lining attitude that enables me to take control of the extraordinary changes resulting from the FBC diagnosis and corresponding treatment. In other words, I can dictate the impact of the change that is occurring.

A positive attitude, calm reasoned choices and a stellar support system are the foundation upon which the change in my life is happening, which makes the whole experience feasible.

Rather than be fearful, I feel brave. Rather than feeling ambivalent, I feel empowered to grow. Rather than feeling despair, I feel hopeful. Rather than focusing on what I don’t have, I focus on what I do have which includes:

  • A phenomenal family, including a HOTY (a/k/a Husband of the Year)
  • Fabulous friends
  • An amazing health care team
  • Extraordinary (!) people reading this blog, posting comments, sending encouraging words and/or sharing experiences
  • Physical strength (for 6 days of the month, anyway)
  • Emotional fortitude
  • Mental stamina
  • Ceaseless curiosity
  • Patient patience
  • Sense of humor
  • Determination
  • Persistent peace
  • Joy! Joy! Joy!
  • SL’s, of course

As I begin to see the light on the other side of FBC (SL), I know that I can change is how I live the rest of my life — making healthy choices and feeling as well as possible, physically, emotionally, intellectually and spiritually.

Change has a considerable psychological impact on the human mind. To the fearful it is threatening because it means that things may get worse. To the hopeful it is encouraging because things may get better. To the confident it is inspiring because the challenge exists to make things better.

–King Whitney Jr.

Leave a comment


  1. says

    Dear Hollye,

    When you are better and I know you will be (me – same exact diagnosis – double mast. and 3 grandchildren later,) I'd love to do some workshops with you. I have a long history of such in L.A. (psychologically/ creatively oriented workshops – started at C.G. Jung Institute.) You would be the young, funny, so so pretty, inspirational one. I'd be the older, but still writing, working, elder – so, so glad to be alive one! I thought my babies were my wildest and greatest peak experiences. Never dreamt that their offspring would be God's greatest, never dreamed of, gift to me and the planet.

  2. Jean Spoonts, Jennif says

    Hollye, You are an amazing woman—a truly inspiring one.

    I wish you luck and lots of love and I pray for you every day and my hope is for a complete cure, and I hope your chemo will be easier this time!!!

  3. Jo says

    Carry on brave, beautiful one. Will be sending good thoughts tomorrow.

    "If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies." ~Author Unknown

  4. Lori Frisbie says

    You always give me such inspiration and you are a true joy(SL)!

    Some musing on the subject of Change:
    Nothing that is can pause or stay;
    The moon will wax, the moon will wane,
    The mist and cloud will turn to rain,
    The rain to mist and cloud again,
    Tomorrow be today.
    ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

    Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights. ~Pauline R. Kezer

    Time, which changes people, does not alter the image we have retained of them. ~Marcel Proust

    Change is inevitable – except from a vending machine. ~Robert C. Gallagher

  5. Jace says

    It is so inspiring that you can focus on the positive during this process–important even when it is difficult. Change is inevitable-simple words that are so true-whether we like it or want it to happen.