Hi There. Oh Hi. Hey. Gosh, this is awkward….
After all, you may (or may not!) have noticed that I’ve been absent for a while. Okay, MONTHS. I took a summer break that turned into a reprieve that turned into a hiatus that turned into a sabbatical that turned into downright absenteeism. The Silver Lining is that I have been living life. Now, the truth of the matter is that I have been living life on life’s terms, which translates to amazing and awful and amazing; hence, the title of the post.
Here on March 1st, 2016, I find myself drawn back to writing on The Silver Pen. In all honesty, I have been thinking about it for quite some time, but have been feeling awkward, uncomfortable, confused and guilty for being gone for such a long time.
Guilt. Whatta word. Anyone else Catholic? My confirmation (at age 13) somehow seemingly confirmed that I was guilty – of what, I never knew, but if the Catholic church said I should feel guilty, then by golly I should. And did!
Should. Another word that I adopted at a young age and am now – finally (!), in my 40s – shedding like a snakeskin.
I digress. As usual. Some things never change….
The past months have brought joyous, painful, interesting and enlightening evolution. I have resisted writing because this transition has been organic, painful, joyous and profoundly real. I inherently felt the need to experience it rather than think about what I was going to write about or my next blog topic.
The thing about blogging is that for a period of time I was in a Grand Canyon-sized rut wherein I kept thinking, “I need to blog about this…” or “This experience would work for this topic…” These reflections made me feel a little cuckoo for coco puffs. In other words, I was living life on the surface – superficially – but not really living.
At some point last summer, my head, heart and soul refused to live in this duplicitous, superfical way. It took a summer trip to Europe – wherein I morphed from a caterpillar to a butterfly – to help me see the light and experience the miracles of mindfulness, joy and presence.
If you’re up for the ride, I’d love to resume our digital dialogue!